Sure, I live in Brooklyn now… but it used to be that I’d roam about the nether parts of New Jersey. I’m from them parts–the soft, middle parts and the slightly more hoary, piney parts down below.
I love Brooklyn, doubt I’ll be leaving any time soon. But you gotta hand it to Jersey. Besides a melange of weirdos, guidos, douche-os, preppos, geekos, and burnouts… the Dirty Jerz has also produced such mega-stars as Eddie Rabbitt and Juice Newton.
And that is why the rest of you lose. Oh, and a special “Fuck you!” to Chicago. Suck it, you windy bitch.
Teen girl #1: You know, besides Manhattan, Brooklyn is the coolest borough. Teen girl #2: Obviously. Queens is boring, the Bronx is scary, and Staten Island is a myth.
There's a battle inherent in everyday life, one that can best be represented by the eternal, mystical battle between the giant squid and the unicorn. It's something like the way that water pours into a shell, swirling around until it reaches the center. Something like the red hot lava of the sun. Like a clown with a substance abuse problem.
Who Might Enjoy This Site:
Anyone who will admit that deer are sexy, and could see themselves saying at some point, "Hey, let's do like, a ton of coke, put on ladies' makeup and those sequined leg warmers like they had on Flashdance, and go out and fuck some deer." And to anybody who's gonna try to be all stuck up and say they don't find deer attractive, you're full of shit. Plus, you know they'd do it to us if they could.
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